Happy Belated Diwali & New Year Folks

Bihari Shabab would like to send out heartiest Diwali wishes to our prized Hindu readership. It is an honor to have you guys here and we couldn't do it without you. No seriously, you guys are the only ones with any cash around here. Plus I'm pretty sure you own three-fourths of the internet and can get us shut down whenever you want. We kid because we love....and because we're going to need a loan here pretty soon.

Now being the uncultured jackals that we are here at Bihari Shabab, Diwali has historically only marked the opening of the latest Shah Rukh / Karan Johar Jatin-Lalit chamkeeli extravaganza. But it's significance is so much more than that. And so we turn to our resident Hindu history expert, Dr. Laxmiprasad Wikipedia:

The festival marks the victory of good over evil, and uplifting of spiritual darkness. Symbolically it marks the homecoming of goodwill and faith after an absence, as suggested by the Ramayana.

On the day of Diwali, many wear new clothes and share sweets and snacks. Some North Indian business communities start their financial year on Diwali and new account books are opened on this day.

Hindus have several significant events associated with it:

• Return of Lord Ram to Ayodhya
• The Killing of Narakasura
• Austerities of Shakti
• Birth of Goddess Lakshmi
• Krishna defeating Indra

Awesome! So once again Happy Diwali to everyone out there, not just our Hindu readers. The festival of lights is something that can and should be appreciated by the rest of you miserable asses as well. Now we leave you with a clip that signifies how we all aspire to spend all of our Diwalis. Through the scope of Kim Sharma's ample cleavage: