Magical Elixir Found to Cure Violence.

Kashmir, once a breeding ground for extremism has found itself in relative peace with violence steadily decreasing. Why, you ask? Well according to the BBC as violence decreases the amount of liquor stores and demand for alcohol increases which can only mean that alcohol is ridding the world of terrorism!

There has been a sharp fall in violence in Indian-administered Kashmir and at the same time the consumption of alcohol has started picking up fast.

Between April 2007 and February 2008, more than 1.2 million bottles of IMFL (Indian-made foreign liquor) and beer were sold in the Valley.

But as always there are people against freedom and peace:

When the first outlet opened, activists of a militant women's group, Dukhtaran-e-Millat (Daughters of Faith) ransacked it and local residents pledged support to their campaign.

As always the vagi-thugs want to ruin everyone's good times, luckily we still have people willing to uphold security for the sake of Kashmir:

"It takes immense courage to run a liquor shop," one Muslim worker at the shop tells me.

History backs up my assertions too, every nation with alcohol has become a productive and prosperous nation; Ireland....well ok not the dirty Irish, Russia.....you have to be a drunk capitalist to succeed apparently (Godless heathens), trailer parks..... meth addictions will not cure anything but a lack of herpes from Brett Michaels. I got it! Indian Reservations, the Iroquois nation has a high rate of alcoholism and casinos.