West Virginia Is For Lovers....Who Happen To Be Siblings

An artist rendering of what we think Mr. Simpson looks like.

I know that so far in this little endeavor of ours we have avoided getting too political. Heck, we've pretty much avoided talking about anything really that doesn't involve the enchanting skills of Rakhi Sawant. There are a couple reasons for this. The first and most important being that we are, for the most part, remarkably shallow. Aww-inspiringly even. The depths of our shallowness really knows no bounds. But another reason is the fact that it is almost impossible to talk about politics without sounding like a big ole' bag of douche. It can't be done. Trust us, we've tried talking with the fine people at SAALT, and we feel like punching ourselves in the face every time an asinine comment of ours like "Barack Obama is totally like Raj Aryan Malhotra in Muhabbaetin, I would totally write on a leaf and salute him if he asked me to" is met with an awkward silence. So we've come to a healthy compromise. We will only talk about politics in the least cringe inducing way possible. Namely highlighting other people's faults and snickering at them from a far.

Sometimes this is going to be easier than others. As in the case of lifelong Democrat and West Virginia resident, Leonard Simpson, who explained to the Financial Times website, why he will not be casting a vote for Illinois Senator Barack Obama in the upcoming WV primary this coming Tuesday.

“I heard that Obama is a Muslim and his wife’s an atheist,” said Mr Simpson, drawing on a cigarette outside the fire station in Williamson, a coalmining town of 3,400 people surrounded by lush wooded hillsides."

The fact that a half retard baboon like Mr. Simpson has a vote is a smidge scary. Do you know how hard you have to work to not know that Obama isn't a Muslim? Not only would you have to go out of your way to avoid any television news in the last year and a half also have to dodge newspapers like they were the plague, or in the case of Mr. Simpson, you know, a black person.

I mean sure it's a little hypocritical for us to be saying this, considering I'm voting for Obama on the basis that he plays basketball and because I like rap music, and because Hillary Clinton's daughter is more uncomfortable talking about her mother in public than Shah Rukh's daughter in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. But I guess what the moral here is that we all go and vote*. S0 we look forward to casting our vote this November alongside you Mr. Simpson, you newspaper avoiding, sister-hitting-on, current BC of the week nominee and front runner, racist to an almost adorable level son of a bitch you.

*So not the moral, but I can't think of another way to end this post.

FT.com
Kuch Kuch Hota Hai - Part 2
Barack Obama Mixtape